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photo: Austin Kirk on flickr

photo: Austin Kirk on flickr

Dear Meli,

What do you do when you feel down? Most of the time I feel pretty good about things, but sometimes, so seemingly no reason, everything looks bleak. What do you do when the glass suddenly looks less than half full – and cracked?!

Suddenly Sulky


Dear Sulky,

There are so many options for your answer! When I feel down, there are many tools I pull from, depending on why I am feeling blue, and which tools call to me in the situation.

Here is a list of some of the possibilities:

1) I check, first, to make sure I’m not grieving.

Not to imply that grieving is simple! Far from it! However, it is the one process that absolutely needs honoring.

I place this at the top of the list because it can be common, in some spiritual circles, to try not to feel good all the time – even when one is grieving.

Grief is its own thing. It has its own time and process. Judging ourselves, or trying to get ourselves out of the feeling of grief, does not aid this mandatory process!

So don’t forget to check this first. If you do what they call “spiritual bypass” instead, it WILL bite you in the proverbial butt! (And no one wants that!)

2) I journal.

I use this option often. If I feel stuck and I’m not sure why, I break out my diary. To help gain clarity about what to do in a challenging situation, I write.

To deepen understanding about what I’m saying to myself that’s making feel bad, I break out the paper.

I write to understand the lie that I’m telling myself. Because one thing is for sure, if I’m feeling bad, I am believing something that is simply not true. As I get clear about what the truth is, I feel better!

3) I meditate and/or pray.

Spiritual practice is a sure way to lighten the load of life. The relief from this method is sometimes immediate for me. Other times, it takes a bit more doing. Either way, it’s my favorite way to a happier place.

4) I pet our cat.

I’m so grateful that I can say this again! We just got united with our new cat, and petting an animal is a sure way to the fastest better-feeling experience!

5) I exercise.

Whatever I can fit in, I can. Whenever it is, it doesn’t matter. Just move the body and you’ll feel uplifted in no time at all!

6) I say affirmations.

Even if the affirmation isn’t about the issue challenging me, sometimes just saying and feeling them is enough.

7) I look for the good in the situation, and get myself grateful.

Sometimes this one is more of a challenge, but it is always well worth the effort! This method is often rich with added benefits. There is often, within my search for “how even this is a good thing,” a wonderful lesson or opportunity for growth that will continue to serve me for the rest of my years.

8) Talk it out with a trusted person.

This works especially well if you have awesome people in your life, like I do. 🙂

Often, someone I lean on has just the right answer for me!

Also, because I have wonderfully wise friends, they will lovingly kick my butt and honestly point out the error of my ways, or my thinking. It can be difficult at times, but it always works to help me (eventually) feel better.

This has the added benefit of creating an opportunity for trust and intimacy. Always a good thing, as long as you choose wisely.

9) I pamper myself!

There is nothing like a little extra self-love to help sink into the Love that is the reality of all things. Sinking into this love always feels sweet, and can successfully soften my sadness, or anger.

10) Read something inspiring.

This one seems like it should be higher on my list. But I always have to be sure I’m not trying to repress my emotions. So I tend to save this for later, so I can be sure I’m doing this from a healthy place.

11) Get productive.

Sometimes when I’m feeling down, I find something to accomplish. This almost always makes me feel better. It might be something I have procrastinated about doing. Then I get the double benefit of feeling good because I did something, and feeling good because I accomplished something I’d been procrastinating about.

I know I’ve left out some great ideas. But I also know there are plenty of folks reading this who have their best and favorite methods. So please chime in on this! Every tip is welcome!

Blessings and Love to you in all you do,

Meli

What is your experience with bad moods? Share your comments below!

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