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Blog
When Is It Okay to Be Selfish?
Dear Meli, Is it okay to be selfish? I always think of it as a bad thing, but recently someone pointed out to me that the people accusing you of being selfish are often wanting you to follow their agenda. How can I learn to be selfish without being obnoxious or overly...
How to Make Super-Amazing-Incredible Affirmations, Part 2
In the first post of this series, we covered the first step of making Super-Amazing-Incredible Affirmations: Composition. (If you missed it, you can check it out here.) Now that we have our Super-Amazing-Incredible affirmation, there's another key component to its...
How Do You Handle Betrayal?
Dear Meli, Jan and I have been best friends for about ten years. I met her through my job, and we immediately hit it off. We have been through a lot of stuff together, and I always thought she had my back. Recently, I found out that she has been saying bad stuff about...
How to Make Super-Amazing-Incredible Affirmations, Part 1
I love affirmations. Affirmations – positive, affirmative statements in the present tense designed to shift your thinking around a specific issue – have improved my life a thousand fold. But let's be honest. Affirmations get a bad rap. People diss them. They make fun...
11 Ways to Lift a Bad Mood
Dear Meli, What do you do when you feel down? Most of the time I feel pretty good about things, but sometimes, so seemingly no reason, everything looks bleak. What do you do when the glass suddenly looks less than half full – and cracked?! Suddenly Sulky Dear Sulky,...
Transgender Bathroom Access: A Love Story
I'll never forget the first time a woman screamed when I walked into a women's bathroom. I didn't want her to scream. I just wanted to pee. But my short hair, tall frame and androgynous features led her to believe that a man had walked into the bathroom. I stuck out...
What’s the Connection Between Politics and Law of Attraction?
Dear Meli, I have been a follower of spiritual teachings for about a decade, particularly the Law of Attraction. Most of the people I have met who are interested in this kind of teaching are on the liberal end of the political spectrum. I have to say that this...
Empower Yourself by Eliminating This Word From Your Vocabulary
There are lots of words it's better to avoid. Mean words. Nasty words. (I'm not going to say any of them, because that wouldn't fit into the category of avoiding them, now would it?! There is also a word that appears to be utterly benign, but is not. Not at all. I...
Can You Surrender Without Giving Up?
Dear Meli, A word I hear a lot in spiritual circles is "surrender," especially in relation to surrendering to a Higher Power. I have a hard time with this concept. "Surrender," to me, sounds to me giving up. What is your experience with this? Suspicious of Surrender...
Thoughts and Feelings and Fears, Oh My! (Video)
Are you a good meditator? Or a bad meditator? That was a trick question! There's no such thing as a bad meditator. Everybody thinks. A lot. And meditation is the process of watching our thoughts. So meditation, by definition, tends to involve lots of thinking. Because...
Can You Be a Godparent and Not Talk About God?
Dear Meli, I am the godmother of my sister's children. I was incredibly honored to be asked, and I love my two nephews. There's only one problem. My sister doesn't believe in God. She and her husband did the baptism in a church to satisfy his parents. They never talk...
A Wacky Way to Stop Caring What Other People Think
I admit it. I care what other people think of me. Though not nearly as much as I used to. But even much-less-than-I-used-to is still too much for me. So lately, I've been working on letting go of other people's opinions even more. Or should I say, what I think their...