View the post > My Guru Has a Tail, Episode 25: The Impossible Thing

There are all kinds of quizzes out there about how to tell if you’re compatible with someone, but I’ve come to appreciate that I am already in possession of the best relationship barometer ever. We all are. I first came to this realization with the dissolution of an old friendship. This was a tough one. […]

View the post > My Relationship Test

Over the years, I’ve had a lot of things happen to me on stage – good, bad, and in between. Recently, I experienced something I knew was possible, but it had never happened to me. The morning started innocently enough, though a bit on the shaky side. I had been awake for a period of […]

View the post > The Best Worst Thing That’s Ever Happened to Me On Stage

How do you feel about transitions? Do you love the excitement of change? Do you relish the moving and morphing of any and/or every aspect of your life? Or do you view transitions with all the fear and trepidation of small child, being approached by a cackling stranger covered in slime, offering what is clearly […]

View the post > My Guru Has a Tail, Episode 24: Tricky Transitions

My unplugged day is like a Magic Rest Stop on the highway of my life. It’s the place where I can refuel my energetic tanks. Top off my spiritual oil. Wipe clean the windows of my mind that have become foggy with too much activity and outward focus. Plus there’s snacks! I’ve written about my […]

View the post > How I Plugged Up My Unplugged Day

When you think about name calling, you probably think about taunts, jeers, and other generally-not-nice verbal utterances. But lately, I’ve been using name calling in another way. An uplifting way. It goes like this. I’m in the checkout line at the grocery store. The clerk at the register is someone I’ve never met before. But […]

View the post > The Upside of Name Calling

You probably think you already know the crucial difference between guilt and shame. And you do know one difference. A major difference. Guilt says, “I made a mistake.” Shame says, “I am a mistake.” Shame also says, “I am bad and wrong and don’t deserve to live.” Yeah. Shame really knows how to party. Indeed, […]

View the post > The Crucial Difference Between Guilt and Shame

Back when I was in psychology grad school, we were taught that when a couple is having the same fight again and again – over how to load the dishwasher properly, for example – the fight was merely a decoy. A cover for something deeper. As a therapist, it was our job to uncover the […]

View the post > How to Solve a Perpetual Couple’s Fight

No, I’m not going to talk about lying to myself about my sexuality. Or my gender expression. I’ve covered those before. This lie has to do with something much Bigger. Though, at the time, I thought I was the biggest thing around. My family rarely went to church, so it was easy to sidestep the […]

View the post > My Teenage Lie and the Truth I Denied

They say that necessity is the mother of invention. But sometimes? Sometimes necessity is a mother. If you know what I mean. And I think you do. Let’s go back to 2012, shall we? 2012 was the last year of the Mayan calendar. A lot of folks thought the world was going to end in […]

View the post > Necessity Is a Mother