Having the ability to check my words before they escape from my mouth is a great gift to myself and others. Perhaps my words are true, but not kind. Perhaps they are both true and kind, but not necessary in a particular moment. In cases such as these, I can keep my words inside my mouth. They don’t need to come out for air. As a result, my conversations are loving and respectful. Everyone wins!
I went back to the church I left yesterday to support a friend who was going to be welcomed to the Board. Minister spoke about loving kindness. Same minister who coldly fired my musical director friends. Message yesterday seemed to be saying only give loving kindness to people you like. There was a time at the membership meeting to speak, and I kept quiet! Lost to much sleep tossing and turning last night wondering why I kept quiet. I know I have deep wounds about standing up to parental power. But, even answering your questions still didn’t make it feel healthy for me to remain quiet. I now know it wasn’t whatever the current issue was yesterday, it was me dealing with the PTSD of my youth. According to Kaiser, what I’m going through isn’t therapy worthy. So, I am so grateful for the opportunity to work out stuff here. Thank you
Hi Gary,
Thank you for writing. Sorry for the situation that you’re going through. It sounds painful and challenging. We’re so grateful that you’re “here” with us, and that this has provided a space for you to get clearer on things and work stuff out. We are both sending you lots of LOVE!
Melissa and Z