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Dear Meli
How Can I Stop Judging My Family for Their Politics?
Dear Meli, It's been an intense couple of months, what with the election and Covid. But in my family, the intensity has been going on for four years. My family of origin and I have very different political views. We tried to have civil discussions, but we found it...
How Do I Handle My Stress About Politics?
Dear Meli, I've been very upset about politics. There's so much hatred and divisiveness and it's really stressing me out. I'm trying not to watch the news too much, but then I also get more worried when I'm not paying attention to what's going on. It's also been...
Is It Okay to Cut Family Members Out of Your Life?
Dear Meli, I have a cousin who is very difficult for me. He is younger than me, and is the baby of his family. I'm the oldest in mine, and have looked out for him a lot of my life, especially since both of his parents died about 10 years ago. However, I'm starting to...
How Can I Get My Boyfriend to Be Kinder?
Dear Meli, I've been with my boyfriend for over three years. At the beginning of our relationship, things were really good. But the last two years haven't been great. He criticizes me a lot, including in front of other people. When I tell him not to, he's says I'm...
Is It Over Yet?
Dear Meli, At the beginning of Covid and Shelter at Home, a lot of my friends and family were freaking out. I, however, was cool, calm, and collected. Everything was going to be fine, I told everyone. Yeah. But see, this thing just keeps going. It's still going on!...
Why Do I Have to Deal with Racism If There’s No Racism in Spirit?
Dear Meli, Spirit is the basis of everything, right? And since that's true, isn't it the case that if I just focus on Spirit, everything that is unlike Spirit - like hatred and racism - will just go away? I've been taught that what I focus on increases. So if I focus...
Is It Okay to Be Chill When Everyone Else Is Freaking Out?
Dear Meli, I know that a lot of people are having a really hard time these days. People are dying. People are losing their jobs. People are super stressed out. I am definitely feeling for all those folks that are having a hard time right now, and .... This whole...
How Do I Survive the Pandemic?
Dear Meli, So, we're having a pandemic! I am currently stuck at home, working full time from my computer. I'm used to a vibrant office with lots of people, and now I'm home all the time. To make matters worse, I'm home with my husband, who is driving me craaaaaazy....
Are You Supposed to Ignore Bad Things?
Dear Meli, I have a friend who's super spiritual. She's always trying to tell me that if I just change my thinking, my whole life can change. But I have a bunch of hard stuff in my life. How am I supposed to ignore that? That seems like unhealthy denial. Bothered by...
Can You Be Too Nice?
Dear Meli, I'm a nice guy. Really, I am. It aligns with who I am and my spiritual values. But maybe I'm too nice? I have a tendency to be drawn to people who need my help. And while it feels really good to help them, I'm starting to wonder if it's a trap. I recently...
How Can I Stop Fighting with Myself?
Dear Meli, I have a history of fighting with myself, especially when it comes to my weight. Lately, I’ve been getting in touch with different aspects of myself, and I’m realizing that there’s a part of me that really wants to lose weight. But there’s another part of...
Do You Have to Spend the Holidays with Your Family?
Dear Meli, The holidays are upon us. Yikes! I know everyone loves Christmas - or a lot of people do - but I'm not one of them. My mom died a few years ago, and ever since then my older brother has taken over being the host for Christmas. My brother is a really hard...