Dear Meli,
My wife and I recently met some new friends at a party. They are about our age and live nearby. They are kind, friendly, and fun to be around. There’s just one thing that I’ve been grappling with. They’re atheists. They don’t believe in any sort of Higher Power. My wife and I are both super into spiritual practice, as are most of our friends. I’m finding it strange to hang with peeps who aren’t into spirituality at all. Though, I must admit, it’s also a little refreshing. Do you have any thoughts or advice for me?
Super Spiritual
Dear Spiritual,
Congratulations on finding new friends you vibe with! It’s particularly fun to find another couple you enjoy! Making friends, as a couple, with another couple? It means all four of you enjoy one another – each pair and each set of 3. It’s more difficult than a single person finding a new friend.
I should also say upfront that some of my best friends are atheists!
Seriously, though. If you have enough other shared interests and enjoy one another, and they’re kind?! That would always be a win in my book.
Z and I always ask ourselves one question, after spending time with new possible buddies. How do we feel after we’ve hung out with them? Did we enjoy the time? And did we walk away feeling uplifted? Or sad and/or drained?
We have had situations just like yours. And when we walk away feeling grateful for the gift of the time together and we look forward to more – that is our answer!
It can be fun to talk about spirituality, consciousness, and transformation with friends who share that passion. But I also find joy – deep, fulfilling pleasure – in hanging out with friends who are not overtly spiritually focused but are deep thinkers and loving, kind beings. As long as they share authentically, and are interested in us, it can be fun! I find that the banter and joy of conversation that is not about spirituality, directly, can be just as spiritually nourishing. And, as you said, refreshing at times!
As the Bible and song, say: “To everything…there is a season.” I find that I enjoy many types of people. Kindness seems to be the first thing I’m drawn to, followed by quick wit and a playful nature. Everyone has their own priorities. But when we find people who bring us joy, I think that’s far too valuable to take lightly or walk away from!
I say enjoy your new buddies! Who knows what you all might learn from one another?!
Blessings and Love to you in all you do!
In Joy,
Melissa
What is your experience with spiritual compatibility in friendships? Share your comments below!
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Ok, kind friendly fun to be around is always good in my book.
Peace and Love,
Gaelen
Hi Gaelen, And you are all those things too – kind, friendly, and fun to be around!! BIG Love, Melissa
I am thankful for the perfect timing of this article this morn. I too am venturing outside my usual “spiritual” circle of friends & acquaintances – this is excellent advice (I jotted down notes even! 😊). The world is changing so rapidly, as am I, and consciously looking at core values lands well in my soul…and it’s exciting to openly embrace the perspectives of other ways of being & believing into my life. We’re all just different puzzle pieces of the same puzzle, I say. ❤🙏😇
Hi Arabella Marie! Yes, I love this. We are indeed just different puzzle pieces of the same puzzle. Well said! I love this. Great to hear from you and thank you for your comment!! Love, Melissa
I was so delighted to read your response to the “new friends” questions. It completely validates my thoughts. Before I even looked at your words, I thought… “Of course, get to know these new friends!” When I review the people I love spending time with, I realize we run the gamete from atheist to fundamental Christian. Granted, there are some conversations we chose not to have with each other, but that is done consciously and in agreement. The love we have for one another overpowers any differences in philosophies and in my book, it’s all about love.
Hi Diane,
Well said! It truly is all about love. Yes. When we know this, everything falls into place.
Thank you for your comment!
BIG Love,
Melissa
Yes, embrace them for sure. I do appreciate being with like- minded folk, and there is more to be like- minded about than spirituality particulars. One’s compassion, empathy, appreciation of beauty, nature, humor, integrity, kindness… all fit my definition of Spiritual nature, but someone else might not label it that way. Who cares what the label is. 🏷 the Core of it is the same. I so enjoy the expansiveness of meeting new humans with whom I can learn how to be a fuller human myself.
Hi Marina!
I always love “seeing” you here!
I love ALL the things you listed as possible like-minded qualities. I say Yes to all those! I agree completely! Beautifully said.
BIG Love,
Melissa